“People are their most beautiful when they are laughing, crying, dancing, playing, telling the truth, and being chased in a fun way” is a quote from Amy Poehler’s book Yes Please. I tweeted it 5 years ago when I read the book, and it came up on my Timehop this morning and I very suddenly had a wave of memories cross my mind. Isn’t it funny how a simple thing such as a quote can spark something intense inside of you?
A lot happened in 2020; some good, some bad, but all lessons. For me, many of the lessons were in gratitude for what and who we have in our lives.
As 2021 creeps up with its usual excitement for a fresh start, we are then greeted with the realization that not much is actually going to change come January 1st. Stay at Home orders are reverting to stricter policies, many will still remain jobless and are now approaching homelessness as the foreclosure relief programs expire (make sure you check your state websites for details about mortgage relief and eviction moratoriums because many are being extended), and although a vaccine has been approved getting two doses out to 7.5 billion people is not going to be easy.
These two conflicting ideas have been rolling around in my head for a while: 2021 is a symbol of a fresh start, but it’s also a stark reminder that we had to deal with a lot this year and must continue to endure a lot of pain in the upcoming months. Over the past week I have felt proud of myself for finding strength inside of me this year, and then later that day I’ll be lying in bed feeling defeated believing I didn’t accomplish anything this year. So many decisions this year have been out of my control, out of most of our control. The year felt ugly. That quote from Amy Poehler’s book pushed me back a little and touched me in an unexpected but important way.
“People are their most beautiful when they are laughing, crying, dancing, playing, telling the truth, and being chased in a fun way.”
It reminded me that although this year was arguably a hot, disgusting dumpster fire… I did laugh and happy cry and dance. This year was the first time I told the truth in regards to how I was actually feeling. The time old “How are you?” “I’m fine.” “But how are you really?” conversation was really important this year. I spoke with friends and coworkers and even publicly on social media that I was not okay at many points in this year. I took PTO from work for no other reason than to practice some self care and did not feel guilty about “losing a vacation day.” My friends (God bless them, truly) made me laugh so much over group text and Zoom gatherings that for many hours of this year I forgot that this wasn’t normal. Although many weddings and events were cancelled, life did not stop. My best friends got engaged and bought houses and had babies and I happy cried on the phone with each of them. Tik Tok got us all dancing and whether you were good or bad it felt good; to dance, to see others dance, and to dance together with friends or coworkers. We found new ways to play and got to jump back into a world of imagination. Virtual Codenames, virtual murder mystery parties, virtual speed dating, Zoom beer pong, Quarantine olympics, even puzzles made a comeback. Despite that fact that the extra time we found in our lives was forced upon us, we all still made the time and effort to come together this year to laugh, cry, dance and play… and boy was it beautiful.
As social media is full of “Top Nine” posts and 2020 compilations, remember that just because you may not have a lot of photo memories to “show off” there are probably a few moments tucked in the back of your mind that deserve a second thought. The mark of a good year doesn’t have to be a list of things you accomplished. It could be a list of hard conversations you had with family members, it could be a list of friends that you kept up with over quarantine, it could be the amount of therapy sessions you attended, the amount of breaths you took, songs you sang at the top of your lungs, or the number of tears that fell and hurt but reminded you that you were alive.
Tonight, as a new year opens its daunting arms to all of us, look away. Look to your “Bad Girls Club” text thread, look at all the memes you screenshotted this year, look at your “What is Time?” playlists. And look in a mirror to remind yourself that although this year wasn’t what we expected, we grew, we learned, and we felt more in our souls than ever before.
Whether you are making vision boards tonight, burning metaphorical items in a bonfire, working or going to bed early - know that this year wasn’t a total bust. Good things happened and will happen again. I believe things will get better and in the meantime - we adapt and work towards a better tomorrow.
“People are their most beautiful when they are laughing, crying, dancing, playing, telling the truth, and being chased in a fun way.” People are their most beautiful when they are feeling and going through something and creating their story. Plans get cancelled, but that doesn’t mean life stops.
Enjoy tonight, and every night moving forward. We are in this together and there is beauty in our struggles and in our triumphs. At the end of the day every single one of us is just looking down and wondering when the last time we changed our sweatpants was anyway.
Happy New Year to all the messy, emotional, struggling, triumphant, confident, goal-setting, mid-day napping, sweatpants wearing beautiful people of the world. See you in 2021!
